2 Homemade Blueberry Muffins: 340 Calories
3 All Natural Fruit Strips: 135 Calories
McDonald’s Grilled Chicken Sandwich: 350 Calories
McDonald’s Small Fries: 230 Calories
McDonald’s Medium Coke: 105 Calories
2 McDonald’s Chicken Nuggets: 100 Calories
1 Piece of French Bread: 70 Calories
1/2 Raspberry Jelly Donut: 150 Calories
1/16 of a 20 oz Mountain Dew: 18 Calories
4 Cups of Water: 0 Calories
Total: 1,498 Calories
35 Minutes of Vigorous Calisthenics: -410 Calories
7 Minutes of Light Calisthenics: -35 Calories
Total: -445 Calories
Complete Total: 1,053 Calories
Today was a very low day for me. I was fine until right before I worked out. Which is why I worked out so much. Usually working out makes me feel better about myself, but today it just made it worse. I don’t know why but it made it so much worse. I just felt so fat. It’s like, I looked down and didn’t see any progress, even though I knew it was there, so I worked out like crazy and then I looked back and didn’t see anything again and just said ‘Fuck this.’ and ate half a jelly donut and McDonald’s, which, by the way, wasn’t as good as I remembered. It was like I had given up.
Literally the only thing that saved me for going way over my caloric intake was that work out. I just don’t know what happened. It was terrible. I have no idea what happened to me and I wish it never had. And I hope it NEVER happens to you guys. I know that one day, maybe a far away day, or sometime near, maybe even a day in the past, his will happen to you. You’ll binge and feel like crap. You’ll feel fat the entire day and feel like you’ll never get there. You’ll feel like you’re not even WORTH the body you want.
But, let me tell you something. You are worth it. You’re not fat. You will get there. And you’ll feel better after you relax yourself. No one is perfect. We all binge. I was lucky to have worked out, but not every one is. And that’s okay. Yes, it’ll set you back a day, but you WILL get back on track. You have to. Just like I do. We’re worth being the person we want to be, and, damn it, we’re going to bust our asses to get there. All of us. You, me, her, him. Whoever. We’re GOING to do this. All of us.
Don’t loose hope.